CK just left. I didn't start crying until he was down the stairs. I held it so long that my nose was running all day. I have been sitting in the attic all day looking for jobs. Mainly to avoid him. I don't understand why it still hurts so much. He still wear the gold necklace that I got him for his birthday years ago. He has worn it everyday since but it has lost it's meaning. It's just a necklace and no one knows the significant of it. I loved him for nine years and he tells me a textbook excuse. I will never accept what has happened and I will never forgive him. I will just have to deal with it because I have to.

No one understand. Not even Ck understands what has happened. He chose to let it fail because he was CK, he is selfish.